http://www.development.afamilysheartbreak.com/blog/
Reading through this material has been quite a journey for me.....as a divorced Mom myself, thinking about this subject from mine and my own children's experience, has shown me that we could all do with a little help in this area so that we might do a better job at minimising the self doubt and emotional torment that parental separation inevitably brings to us all who experince it, parents and kids alike. It was this paragraph that struck me personally....I'm sure lots of us can relate to it, if we're honest!
'How many of us announce we are taking the high road by saying, “I’ll never say anything bad about Mom/Dad,” but secretly want the child to say something bad instead? Maybe we need a little validation or reassurance. Whatever the reason, if you’re honest you’ll admit you’ll take whatever putdown your child is willing to offer.'
I really doubt there is a best case senario...the best hope we have is that we can try to lessen the fall out...but it is clear to me that this is probably THE most contentious and challenging experience we will face in our lives! The disolution of our partnership...and the subsequent relationship with our ex that we must maintain, for our children.There is no running away from this dilenma, even though you may REALLY REALLY want to!!
For more info and support for fathers and those interested in this debate -
Families need fathers
http://www.fathers-4-justice.org/
What do you think? Do you believe PAS in an actual syndrome...like 'stockholm syndrome' for instance? Because it would seem our family courts and the decision makers for our children don't yet believe it has sufficient validation in the UK. I'd love to know your views?!
I need to say that in cases of domestic abuse and harm, it is essential that you seek experienced support, both legal and emotional while you are working throught these difficult issues.
Domestic abuse by it's very nature undermines a person's capacity to judge a situation accurately...and it is always advisable in my mind that you have someone you can trust to talk things through with, whenever there may be potential safetey issues to consider, and critical decisions to be made, for yourself and your children sake.
Need help? Here's a link to Women's Aid UK.
http://www.freedomprogramme.co.uk/
Reading through this material has been quite a journey for me.....as a divorced Mom myself, thinking about this subject from mine and my own children's experience, has shown me that we could all do with a little help in this area so that we might do a better job at minimising the self doubt and emotional torment that parental separation inevitably brings to us all who experince it, parents and kids alike. It was this paragraph that struck me personally....I'm sure lots of us can relate to it, if we're honest!
'How many of us announce we are taking the high road by saying, “I’ll never say anything bad about Mom/Dad,” but secretly want the child to say something bad instead? Maybe we need a little validation or reassurance. Whatever the reason, if you’re honest you’ll admit you’ll take whatever putdown your child is willing to offer.'
I really doubt there is a best case senario...the best hope we have is that we can try to lessen the fall out...but it is clear to me that this is probably THE most contentious and challenging experience we will face in our lives! The disolution of our partnership...and the subsequent relationship with our ex that we must maintain, for our children.There is no running away from this dilenma, even though you may REALLY REALLY want to!!
For more info and support for fathers and those interested in this debate -
Families need fathers
http://www.fathers-4-justice.org/
What do you think? Do you believe PAS in an actual syndrome...like 'stockholm syndrome' for instance? Because it would seem our family courts and the decision makers for our children don't yet believe it has sufficient validation in the UK. I'd love to know your views?!
I need to say that in cases of domestic abuse and harm, it is essential that you seek experienced support, both legal and emotional while you are working throught these difficult issues.
Domestic abuse by it's very nature undermines a person's capacity to judge a situation accurately...and it is always advisable in my mind that you have someone you can trust to talk things through with, whenever there may be potential safetey issues to consider, and critical decisions to be made, for yourself and your children sake.
Need help? Here's a link to Women's Aid UK.
http://www.freedomprogramme.co.uk/
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