I just posted this on my daughter's facebook wall with the comment ' it's a tough job, good thing it's you doing it!' I re-read it and laughed realising it could sound like I'm saying I wouldn't want the job! It was intended as an affirmation that what she is, who she is good, certainly 'good enough' and I'm so proud of her.
I know, having raised four children, pretty much single handedly, it's a tough job! The most demanding, thankless, most rewarding, enjoyable job of a life-time. It's the one job I remember reading recently, that we will get, (accept, be given, fall into, it doesn't matter) regardless of our lack of prior experience, qualifications, or education. And yet we willingly enter motherhood anyway, most of us without any real notion at all of what it's going to take from us. I did write 'ask' of us, but realised there is no asking, because by this point we really don't have a choice, do we ladies?! We also don't realise we won't have any real appreciation of the pay-off until we're half a lifetime down the road looking back.
Yes, I do believe mother nature happily kicks our romantic backsides through that door with a knowing smile on her face! She knows full well we can have no idea what we're really in for, so she starts us off as she means to carry on, with a merciless intro to motherhood - childbirth!
From the moment the first 'real' contraction bites down hard we're wide awake, oh yes... and well aware that there's no going back (unfortunately) remember at this point it's all pain and no gain! The journey has begun and there's no getting off this ride any time soon. This is THE most challenging, gruelling, arduous, self defining, self satisfying, edifying journey ever...the journey through motherhood to Nannydom!
This ladies is your reward for it all! The chance to do it all over again (excluding the childbirth bit yay!) only with experience this time. And insight and SKILLS!!! Confidence, and cookies, lotsa cookies. Oh yeah, being someone's beloved Nanny (or Grammy, Nana, or Grandma) is THE best reason for taking the job in the first place, only you won't know it until you get to be in my shoes and that's a ways down the road for lots of you I'm sure.
I hope knowing there is life after kids inspires you to live each day mindfully and graciously. Kind to yourself and kind to your children. Who they are as parents is a testament to your parenting now and each day you invest your love in them unconditionally you will be rewarded ten fold. If your children are blossoms on your tree, then your grand kiddos are definitely the peaches!.
Trust me, it' all worth it!
Some reading if you're interested in The Good enough mother theory explained
This is an excellent book explaining how fundamental Love is to your child's development
Why Love Matters - How Affection Shapes a Babies Brain, by Sue Gerhardt
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